Just some thoughts:
Established writers have benefit of doubt on their side. This means they can get away with mediocrity sometimes.
Writers who are starting out may be mistaken when they use the books of established writers as models for good writing. This does not occur all the time, but there is a field of null-objectivity that surrounds well-known writers, an ‘Emperor has no clothes’ vibe if you will.
Most writers’ work is uneven across their career.
A new writer may do the same thing as an established writer and be criticised or, worse, elicit no reaction whatsoever.
What will help? I am aware of the commonly held fallacy that you should only point out a problem if you have a solution. Since I am not an established writer I clearly don’t know.
I would strongly recommend getting instruction. Stringing sentences together to tell a story is not necessarily writing. I don’t know if you prefer to go the whole hog and get an MFA or do the Greek philosopher thing and find a mentor, or anything in between, but chose something.
Don’t be a sponge. Pay for your tuition. Payment does two things: it makes you serious and it ensures that the teaching is delivered.
Whether you learn or not is another matter.